Welcome to My Chateau.
I am Lady Diamond. I take pride in each and every meal I create. I am very Strict and Diligent with everything I do. I raise nothing but the finest pigs so they are worthy of my table.
Guests are always pleased when they see how wonderfully I display my meals. Red wine from my vineyards, sweet and strong, is always the choice drink.
I'm in the new Movie - Oven Eatible - Here's a deleted scene of me and my Christmas pig that didn't make it into the movie. Join Today and get to see MORE deleted scenes and pictures from the new film!
I'd like to share a bit more about what it's like to be my LongPig:
First off, there are 2 types of LongPigs
1. The Willing - For these ones, I like to spend the time to nurture them, feed them the correct foods to get that perfect size with not a lot of fat and I love to make sure they enjoy the experience just as much as I do!!
I love to get out my famous Lady Diamond Garlic Spread and massage it deep into all the best parts... The Feet - Mmmm 'this little piggy...' lol. I just love getting in a little nibble while I'm doing it too!!
Next I'll usually work my way up, massaging my Garlic Spread into the Calves and Thighs, making sure I get every single inch!! Then I'll grab a whole hand full and massage it nice and deep into the Rump!! At this point I'll probably have my strap-on on me... I'll grab a few extra Garlic Cloves and lather up my Strap-On with my Garlic Spread.... I bet you can just image what I'll do *wink*
After a few minutes or whenever I feel everything it worked in nice and deep, I'll continue my massaging process, working my way up the body to the neck and then down the arms, right to the tips of the fingers... *nibble, nibble* Mmm I love the taste of my Garlic Spread on such fresh perfect meat... But Even More - I love what it tastes like once you come out of the Oven!!!
2. The Un-Willing (The Heartless) - These types, I don't really care for, but sometimes I just like to be cruel... These Pigs are just meant to be food... I would never let them grace my table for a gathering but for storing meat for other days and to make appetizers with - These Pigs are Perfect!!!
Depending on how bad they've been in life - I like to strap them down extremely tight... Sometimes flat on a table or strapped in tightly to a chair. Having them flat down on the table, I'll usually begin by getting the Pig nice and scared - It makes the meat taste a bit better, but also makes it a little stringy - But that's perfect for what I want to do with it!!!!
For the exceptionally evil ones... I have this handy handheld meat grinder... It fits perfectly over the cock... I love hearing them scream! I have a huge Chateau that's far, far away from any other people... No One will hear you!!!
In My Kitchen You will Find:
About Me - Some hints about who I am, what I do and what I enjoy most about cooking!
Recipes - I share some of my most favourite dishes with you. Hints on how to prepare that perfect meal!
My Art - Some of the most Delicious pictures you will ever see. Created by me and shared with all of you!
My Stories - Some of the most erotic, sensual and disturbing things you've ever heard!
And sooo much more!!
Next Kitchen >>>
